It’s finally October which, for many locations means that fall is in full swing. If it isn’t, then there’s likely signs that Fall is on its way.
Here in the California valley, however, it’s been in the high 90s. There are no pumpkins, no apple cider or hot chocolate… In fact, the very thought of a hot pumpkin spice latte is downright unappealing. The leaves are dying because it’s just plane hot. Oh, and the sky is filled with smoke. In short, it’s not very fall-like.
But I love October because of the promise of cooler weather. So I wanted to do a special 4-week October-themed stretch of Flash Fiction– Things like black cats, sentient pumpkins, ghosts…. and of course spiders.
In the midst of the summer that won’t quit the one sure sign that October is here is all the spiders. They’re on the move. In California we’ve got summer, fire season, spider season, a week or two of fall weather, then what the locals like to call “winter.”
That’s why I’ve decided to kick off October Flash Fiction with this piece.
Without further delay, I give you:
Roommates
Jill N Davies
Hey, my name’s Stew and I’m a common American house spider. But there’s something not so common about me. In fact, it’s totally, completely awesome: my roommate is football legend Heinrich Jackson. There’s literally nothing I could complain about when it comes to him… except for one thing: his girlfriend has got to go!
First of all, I know what you’re thinking: how does a house spider even know what football is? Well, let me ask you something: when was the last time you were in a house that didn’t have a TV in it? So yeah, I know what football is.
And Heinrich is the real deal—champion linebacker. Total of 62 sacks in two seasons… and who could forget that legendary interception return for the winning touchdown last season? I know I couldn’t!
But you don’t have to know the first thing about football to know that Heinrich is one helluva guy. He always donates to the exotic animal foundation. I like to think that he does it because of me—because I’m kind of exotic. That and we’re best friends.
When Heinrich’s home we do everything together.
Last month he was home and we were having fun cleaning. He was dusting and picking up clutter. I was making quick work of some fruit flies that had descended upon the bananas that went bad while Heinrich was away.
In his fervor to get the place cleaned up, Heinrich swept up my web. The whole thing happened so fast that I barely had time to evacuate.
Heinrich felt awful, and being the nice guy he is, came back the next day with a replacement. It didn’t matter that it was useless, it was both an apology and a gesture of friendship.
Who would’ve thought a guy like that would end up dating a monster?
I didn’t know it at first on account of it being a long-distance relationship. He met her at an away game. She seemed nice enough in their video chats, but the truth is that she’s jealous. She wants Heinrich all to herself, and I can prove it.
Yesterday she was here for the first time. Heinrich had this romantic evening planned, with candles, fancy plates, wine… the whole thing, ya know? I mean, sure he’s a football player, but he’s a sweetheart deep down. He wears his heart on the overstretched sleeves that cover his hulking football biceps.
I knew how important it was, so I’d made sure to take care of all the bugs in the apartment.
The place was in great shape when she showed up. I could tell Heinrich was nervous from his laugh, but the night was going great. They ate the dinner and drank wine on the sofa while they watched a movie.
I was doing my best to be a good roommate and keep out of their way. The last thing I wanted was be the guy to barge in on their date, but there was a fly making a racket landing on the dirty dishes. I had to do something.
I figured it would be a quick job—get in, handle the fly, get out. They were watching the movie, anyway. No one would ever know I was there. Some spiders are ambush hunters, but not me. I need a web to catch my prey. I had to do a quick job between the faucet and counter. I was just finishing up when Bethany got up from the couch.
“Want more wine?” She asked, trying to sound all nice and considerate.
“Nah, I got practice,” Heinrich said, responsible as ever.
She took both glasses into the kitchen and set them down on the counter. I did my best to slink away into the shadows, but she spotted me.
“Oh my god Heinrich! There’s a spider!” She yelled.
“What? Lemme see,” Heinrich said, getting up from the couch. (I’m sure he was confused about what I was doing in the kitchen. I normally stick to the archway between the dining area and the hall.)
He sauntered up and put his arm around Bethany. (It was obvious how much he liked her, so I don’t know why she had to be so insecure.) She pointed to where I was hiding in the crevasse between the counter and the sink. Her finger tore right through my fresh web.
“Oh hell no,” Heinrich said, seeing how tucked in I was. He got a paper towel because the sink was wet.
Knowing that Heinrich was concerned about me, I decided to show him that I was fine. I crawled out from the crack to give him a thumbs up.
“I got him babe,” He said to Bethany as his awesome, massive hand made its way down to give me our very first high five.
“Oh Heinrich, don’t do it!” Bethany squealed, turning her head away as if she couldn’t stand to see two bro’s bonding.
“He’s not staying. Not in my house!” Heinrich insisted, knowing how dangerous it was for me by the sink.
“Just put him outside,” She said, putting her hand on his outstretched arm to stop him.
“No way I’m not handling a live spider like that!” He said (because he respects me.)
“Fine, I’ll do it,” She said.
She grabbed a cup and slammed it down. It scared the crap outa me! I jumped off the counter and clung to the side of the glass with a bit of webbing. (It comes out on its own sometimes when I’m scared).
“Got him!” She yelled.
And just like that she scooped me up and raced out the door. I landed in the bushes. Satisfied that I was banished, she turned back into the apartment and slammed the door.
I mean, what a jerk right? Kicking me outa my own house!
As soon as I get back in there Heinrich and I are going to talk.
I just have to get his attention while she’s sleeping…
The End
Don’t have time to read? I’ll read it for you on IGTV!
Want something with a bit more meat on the bones? I write short stories for reedsy. You can check out my entries:
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I’ve been published in a winter anthology. Check out my short story Shipwrecked Santa in Angry Eagle’s winter anthology, Apocalyptic Winter- Book 2. You can get your copy on Amazon today
If you’ve got an idea for a flash fiction story send it to me at author@jillndavies.com
Tune in next week for more Flash Fiction.
If you’ve got an idea for a flash fiction story send it to me at author@jillndavies.com.
Tune in next week for more flash fiction.
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